Recently, a client I’ve been working with started spiraling down. They’ve been having trouble sleeping, and was really struggling to figure it out.
What caught my eye here was the subtle story that they were pointing at.
Can you see the line? It says:
“My body has deteriorated due to aging.”
…
I hear this kind of thing all the time.
“I’m too old for this”
“It’s too late late for me to change”
“It feels like my body is beyond hope”
(By the way, I hear this from all sorts of people– whether they’re in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s or 70s)
Your Stories Affect Your Outlook
In this article titled: The transformational power of how you talk about your life, it focuses on a single idea:
“Your stories can affect how happy or unhappy you are with your life.”
Because we all go through difficult times–
But unhappy people are more likely to tell that story focusing on the negative aspects.
An entrepreneur can look back at the same event and tell 2 different stories
“In 2019, I lost my job, and since then I’ve really struggled to make end meet in my new career.”
or
“In 2019, I got laid off, but it was a chance for me to pursue something I’m more passionate about, even though I make less now.”
The trick is in how you tell the story.
And these narratives exist whether we choose to give them much conscious attention or not.
They’re not just stories; they’re the frameworks through which we view and interact with the world.
Change Your Story with a “Yes… And…”
Back in 2011, when my career as an athlete ended, I let myself get stuck in the story of:
I will never be as fast, strong, or fit as I was in my early 20s
So the rest of the decade was just me going to the gym, going through the motions, but not really caring whether I did it or not. Because after all…
I will never be as fast, strong, or fit as I was in my early 20s
Until one day, I heard an older athlete say
“While it’s true, YES, I’ll never be as fast as I was in my 20s… I am more patient now, AND I can learn skills that take years to master– like handstands
The “Yes… And…” can change your story
Will This Work on My Client’s Story?
How would I do it for this person?
Over time, I’d like to get them to a point where they can go from:
“My body has deteriorated due to aging.”
to
“YES, My body has deteriorated due to aging. AND, I know it’s possible to get back some of my health, energy, and movement.”
The narrative needs to shift– otherwise, it doesn’t matter how many exercises, meal plans, or coaching sessions I give them.
Only a shift in language will empower them to make changes.
Collect Some Case Studies
One thing that’s very helpful is to find people who are moving the way you want to move.
Get their stories– and listen to them over and over again.
I can point to people like :
- Harriette Thompson, who became the oldest woman to complete a marathon at 92.
- Or Charles Eugster, who said, “My body was a mess,” and began bodybuilding in his late 80s.
- Then there’s Ida Keeling, setting track records into her 100s.
Their stories defy the common narrative of age as a barrier to fitness and health.
Better yet, find people around you who can give you stories like this.
Do you know any active 80 year olds?
What’s their story? How do they talk about their health?
Catch Yourself Telling a Bad Story
Remember, the story you tell yourself every day has the power to shape your health and your life.
What’s one limiting belief about your health you want to change?
How can you rewrite that part of your story starting today?
Looking forward, how can you adjust your language to emphasize possibility?
Replace “I can’t” with “I’m learning,”
or “I’m too old” with “Let’s see what I can do.”
Let’s write a narrative that empowers and uplifts your health